Narcissist Free

A part of me

After being narcissisticly abused,

they disregard you leaving you confused,

I had to defend myself against their demise,

unknown to me that this was where the start of their game lied,

the more I defended the crazier i looked

and the narcissist had me on their hook,

I started to believe their hurtful words,

that I was crazy, lazy and unworthy of love,

and as my mind replayed all the hurtful days,

fear and anxiety came into play,

migraines,fatigue,depression and PTSD isn’t far away ,

Feeling like this I couldn’t face another day,

to know what needed done and yet can’t find a way,

My head felt heavy and full of wet sand,

I wanted to disappear to another land,

I would lay on the couch and relax my mind,

and think once I’m awake I will get up and grind,

my head so full of darkness and ย noone there to understand,

I had to find a way out ,time for a new plan,

friends shrugged it off like just forget it,

But no one would give me the time to express what I had to say,

cause no one gives depression the time of day,

tell a doctor!! “pop a pill”he would say!, that will keep the root of the issue at bay,

I started to research the narcissistic mind,

I was scared of what I might find,

night after night I searched the net,

hoping that some of my needs would be met,

I gained enough knowledge to sit a psychology lesson,

I couldn’t believe I had been fooled by such a person,

I started to realise where I’d made mistakes,

my self confidence , esteem and boundaries had suffered quite a shake,

I required a lot of self care,

which I do in the time that I manage to spare,

and I am grateful I can say I’m almost there.

 

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10 thoughts on “Narcissist Free

      1. They probably already have. I would love for you to read my book. Our friends saw more than I did… but were afraid to say anything. In fact, a friend contacted me just a few months ago and said something for the first time and that is a decade later.

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      2. It’s amazing how we live with abuse, death threats, etc but we are the ones called “crazy”. My book is entitled The Walking Wounded and it is available on Amazon or you can get an autographed copy from my website through my blog. So much of what we endure is so similar and our stories do help each other. Please let me know if I can help you in any way.

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      3. Yeah that’s true no one sees the damage it causes to us emotionally..I will download it from Amazon..thank you it’s good to know that I’m not the only one going through this..same to you ๐Ÿ™‚

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      4. I know. You are not alone. It really helps to validate that we are not crazy. Thanks for ordering a copy. I would love to know what you think after you read it. I give all proceeds away to help abuse victims. There are so many who have been broken by narcissistic people.

        Liked by 1 person

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